It's interesting how quotes from cartoons keep popping into my head throughout this process. Today's most relevant one is "just keep swimming," a quote from Disney's much loved "Finding Nemo." I'll ellaborate on this more in a moment, but for now, excuse me while I do a little mixing of my metaphors. We are quickly learning that adoption is an unpredictable rollercoaster. You go from waiting in the long line to being jerked through the many sharp twists and turns. There are super high points where you're excitement builds to the point that you think you could literally jump out of your skin just to be quickly thrust to the lowest point of the ride. Today we plunged down from one of our highest peaks so far. It is odd how a situation can be so full of potential at one moment, like you are standing face to face with that beautiful thing that you have dreamt of your whole life, and with one phone call the dream shrinks to a tiny single speck of glitter. It is still beautiful. It is still right there, and technically it is still possible for it to be yours...but not very likely.
So this is where, " just keep swimming" comes back into the picture. In those moments when you feel so tired and like you have come way to far to have just been pushed back to the beginning...in those moments if you stop swimming...you will sink, and you won't ever make it to your goal. So, here is what you do...you take a few seconds to have a pity party and feel sorry for yourself that this is happening AGAIN, you cry a tear or two if you must (but you try really hard not to since you came home from work early today with a migraine and crying is the last thing you need to do for that), and then you get the next round of profile books and agency applications ready to send out tomorrow, and you "JUST KEEP SWIMMING"!
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